Jessie's Not-So-Happy Birthday
Quotes Rachel-Lou's Birthday Prank Rachel-Lou: Heh heh heh, this will teach her to read my diary in front of the entire viewing world. (Alarm sounds 8.5 hours later...) Jessie: Huh? Rachel-Lou: Wake up and feel the coffee! (splashes coffee on Jessie's face) Jessie: (spits, looks at her alarm clock) Holy shit, 7:56? On my birthday? Oh man, I'm gonna be so fucking late. Rachel-Lou: Maybe you should have thought of that before staying up all night, watching Family Guy. Jessie: Fuck you. You're Late, Miss Yoshida! Jessie: Whew, I made it to homeroom. Lucky me. Miss Van Den Bogert: Jessica Yoshida, you are 15 minutes late! Jessie: What, are you kidding miss? My watch says I'm 5 minutes early and I obviously got the right time because you're a blonde and all blondes are stupid. (All the blonde students including Miss Van Den Bogert gasp) Jarrod: Excuse me Jessie, are you saying that we're dumber than you just because of our hair colour? Adoriabelle: Yeah Jess, what the fuck is your problem? Jessie: Chill guys, it's my 18th birthday. Miss Van Den Bogert: Well here's a birthday surprise for you Jessie, I'm giving you 40 minutes detention, after school, in my room! Jessie: What!? Come on miss, you're the coolest Math teacher ever. You can't be serious with this, especially if it's on my birthday. Miss Van Den Bogert: Well I'm sorry Jessie, but not only you insulted me but you also insulted everyone else in this room who is blonde. And to add insult to your injury, I'm going to make you write apology letters to me and all of the blonde students in this homeroom. Jessie: Aw man, I thought Miss VDB would hug me and say "Welcome to the Adult Club!" like what she said to Josh last month and throw a party during homeroom period. Jessie Gets In Trouble During Math Trinity: Psst, Jessie pass this over to Jordan. Jessie: What, no fucking way. Trinity: Just do it! (gives Jessie the note) Mrs Ivanovic: Jessie, what is this note you're passing? Jessie: What? I wasn't passing the note, Trinity gave it to me. Mrs Ivanovic: Well it was in your hands when I saw it. Jessie: At least I'm not the chick who's going to bang Jordan's lightning rod tonight, according to Trinity's note! (Everyone except Trinity, Jordan and Mrs Ivanovic laughs) Mrs Ivanovic: That's it Jessica, you're staying in at Recess and write out on the whiteboard "I will not pass notes and embarrass my classmates" 50 times! Jessie: Oh fuck you Trinity, you dumb blonde! (throws a calculator at her) Jessie In Detention Miss Van Den Bogert: Welcome to detention Jessica Yoshida. Sit down over there and write out your apology letters. After that, Mrs Ivanovic told me that you will be doing Trinity's homework as you knocked her out cold during second period. I've called your parents about your behavior and they are not happy at all. In fact, your mother said to not expect getting any birthday presents at all. Jessie: What, but it's my 18th today! I can vote, I can go to war, I am an adult! Miss Van Den Bogert: Well that's too bad! My 21st birthday was a disaster because one of my friends accidentally broke my arm during a party game. A Very Unlucky Surprise Jessie: Oh man, 5:30 and I'm just got to the door of my house. (opens door) Yoshi: Jessica Colleen Yoshida, your homeroom teacher Miss Van Den Bogert called and she said that you called everyone a dumb blonde, you hit Trinity with a calculator and made Jordan pee his pants! We were going to throw a 18th birthday party but after that phone call, forget it! Jessie: But it's my birthday. Yoshi: Oh save your breath, Jess. Happy 18th Birthday to you my butt! Let's Have a Do-Over! Mrs Michaels: Hey Miss Jess, how was your 18th birthday yesterday? Jessie: Not good. In fact, it was a complete shithole. Mrs Michaels: Oh dear, what happened? Jessie: Miss Van Den Bogert gave me detention for being 20 minutes late but it wasn't my fault, my sister messed with my alarm clock and poured hot coffee on me. Mrs Michaels: Oh my god, why was Miss Van Den Bogert do that, she's every student's best friend, well except for the rebels. Jessie: Then during Math, I was accused by my Math teacher Mrs Ivanovic for passing notes and also embarrassing Jordan and Trinity and she made me write lines during Recess Mrs Michaels: Oh my. Jessie: Then after school, my dad got so angry no-one in my family gave a shit about my birthday. Mrs Michaels: Wow Jess, that's awful. Perhaps you should have an 18th birthday do-over, but post-pone it until next month due to midterms. Jessie: Ok. Where did you get that idea from? Mrs Michaels: I got the idea from a Dons game in 1996 when they played against the Saints and the lights went out in the 3rd Quarter and the remainder of the match was played on the following Tuesday. I know this because I went to that game when I used to live in Australia. Jessie: How old are you? Mrs Michaels: Well I was in my 20's at the time the disaster happened so I'm about 40-something. Not sure though, I haven't looked at my ID lately. Now get to class, I don't want you to get tardy. Trivia Gallery Category:Season 5 Category:Episodes